She Idealist

Idealism over Realism… yes please!!

Archive for the month “December, 2011”

This Girls’ New Year’s Resolutions

What is a resolution?  A resolution is a goal that is set at the beginning of the year – not a wish, a goal.  The point of this goal is to attain it before the the new year arrives.  So, you want to make your New Year’s Resolutions attainable by making them small enough to actually accomplish in a one year time span.  And then break them down into steps of how you can achieve them.  Another great step is to start with your smallest goal and accomplish that one first, so that you build up a “snow ball effect” momentum which will help push you in a positive way towards achieving the rest!

So… want to see this girls’ New Year’s Resolutions?!  In the true spirit of “putting myself out there” for the purpose of pushing you all farther, through this blog, I will share mine with you.  This is not an ‘edited for public’ list… these are my actual New Year’s Resolutions.

This Girls' New Year's Resolutions 2012

This Girls' New Year's Resolutions 2012

For each resolution I have written on this sheet of paper, I have the also broken down into HOW exactly I plan on attaining them.  For example: 3. Drink 8 glasses of water/day – Keep water bottle with me, filled at all times so that I always have water with me to drink.

Another thought – have you ever thought about outsourcing or asking for others’ help in achieving your New Years’ Resolutions or goals?  This is why so many people purchase gym memberships after making their resolutions.  The downside to that theory is that there is no accountability… no one to make sure you go!  There’s a new movie in theaters right now called “New Year’s Eve” in which a lady named Ingrid (Michelle Pfeiffer) gets a courier boy (Zac Effron) to accomplish her entire list off New Year’s Resolutions for her in 24 hours… since she hadn’t been able to do them on her own.  This is of course a movie-version, yet still a great example that you don’t have to go at it alone!  You can ask friends for help.  Or even hire or outsource it out to have it ensured done for you, like Ingrid did.  Either way, accountability (telling someone, and having them check on progress) is a great help to ensure your success!

However you go about it… I wish you good luck!!    You are all now my instant accountability partners.  I have just shared with you a list of things that I WILL accomplish in 2012.

Happy NEW YEAR’S!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sonya… She Idealist.

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Important Things # 24 ~ …Focus on creating what you desire

Focus on creating what you desire….  Hmm, well this is an interesting blog for me to write.  How do I put this into words – I’m coming up with it as I type so be patient with me! LOL

Seriously I am…. totally not kidding. 🙂  However, I am focused on creating this blog post, it is what I desire at this moment… haha… like that tie in!?  🙂 I’m coy that way.  😉  Okay okay, I’m done being funny.  Maybe.  Well, I guess we’ll see…  (okay, I don’t know what’s gotten into me at the moment! HA)  …I suppose I’m losing focus.  LOL

It IS that simple to lose focus.  Especially for us ADD types!  All those out there that relate are nodding their heads in agreement and are already bored and waiting for me to finally get to my point!  Riiight?!  Right!  🙂

As the New Year of 2012 approaches in only 2 days from the moment I am typing this, many of you are making your New Years Resolutions.  Some of you don’t make them because them because you’re afraid you won’t keep them and then will feel unaccomplished.  Personally, I think it is a great thing that we do at New Years…. actually, I think there are two great things that we do at New Years.

Firstly, we reflect.  We reflect on the year that is ending.  What did we do wrong?  What did we do right?  What do we wish we would have had the courage to attempt?  What are we proud of that we were brave enough to try?  Who do we need to break our ties with in our life?  Who are we thankful that we have in our life and want to keep forever?  What have we learned about ourselves that needs to change?  Where in our lives have we grown and become better?  What habit do we want so badly to change?  What do we want to be able to make a habit?  There are so many other questions and moments we ponder.  And pondering can be very productive – as long as you “don’t focus on negative thoughts” and use the pondering only as a building tool.

Then, we make our New Years Resolutions.  From the reflecting and pondering of the ending year, we build our “lists” of what we want and wish for ourselves to accomplish.  Do you make one?  I do.  However, I try to take the tools I learn in all of my leadership, success, sales, and goals books and put them to use to make them actually happen.  One trick… don’t make a list of 100 things!!!!!  Seriously, let’s make this attainable.

For each thing you put on your list, break it down into steps.  Do this by building backwards.  Think of that resolution item as the end goal… the finished building.  And take apart that building piece-by-piece so that you can see from start-to-finish what it takes to build it.  This will give you simple daily steps as a map in which to follow to realistically and actually achieve this goal.  Now… do this for each resolution.  Another helpful thing is to place time frames by each step.  For instance, if this were a true building being built, there are actual time frames that are required in order to file specific paperwork and wait on approvals.  To think you can push through an entire permit process in an hour is quite unrealistic.  So, do a little research and see how long each step should take… set a time frame, and try to hold to it.  By being realistic with your idealistic goals, you will not set yourself up for failure.  Also, if you bust your butt you could actually accomplish this goal faster than anticipated.  Remember, it’s always better to under-promise and over-deliver, even when your client is yourself.  Tools to set these mapped out steps and time frames can be as simple as a Google search, or even better would be someone who already has accomplished this thing in their life.  If you have someone like that, and can ask them to mentor or guide you through it, then you’re a step ahead already.  And from experience, people are normally more than happy to help share their stories of successes.  Don’t believe me… try it… just ask someone. 🙂  You should look at this list daily, keep track of your progress, see what can and needs to be done next, work on doing it, and cross out the steps as you’ve accomplished them.  Personally, I like the act of actually crossing things out on my list.  It makes me feel like I’ve done something… silly I know.  But it works a little. 🙂

Why is it so important to be detailed like this with something that people deem a silly ritual, like New Years Resolutions?  Because they are truly things that you desire!!!!!  The desires of your heart are nothing to be taken lightly.  By taking them as serious as the job you do to earn your living, you will be giving proper focus on creating what you desire.  This… this is having a living, not just earning money to live.  Life is to be enjoyed.  Moments are precious.  Never forget that.

Off to make my New Years Resolutions list now…

What’s on your list????

Sonya… She Idealist.

Important Things # 23 ~ Don’t focus on negative thoughts…

To every thing good there is a bad side that can be found…. if you look for it, you can find it.  I cannot scream loud enough in this written blog, “DON’T FOCUS ON NEGATIVE THOUGHTS!” There, whew, that feels better to get off my chest.  lol

Even though I am a very idealistic and optimistic person, I still find it’s easy to fall prey to negative thoughts.  They play out in full color motion picture in your mind awaiting your attention.  However, they are only there to bring you pain.

Your mind can seem untamable at times, like a wild beast on the prowl for your good fortune.  You CAN learn to control your thoughts though, and this is a key piece in the puzzle to controlling your attitude and emotions.  Learning how to focus on the positive side of the story.  NOTE: I am not intending to tell you to picture the world around you only as an imaginary story book land, instead to keep a grasp on reality and knowing that there are two sides to the story… knowledge is power… and choose to keep focused on the positive side.

Like in the game of tennis (this was my game in High School so you will have to bear with this analogy) – one lesson you learn in the very beginning of tennis lessons is that wherever your hip is pointing, that is likely where the ball will go.  As a rough example… the same holds true of your mind.  Whatever you dwell on, there your life will take you.

Here is a key lesson on keeping yourself from focusing on negative thoughts.  Plant good thoughts constantly!!  Do you remember the old saying, “put good in, get good out & put bad in, get bad out”…. well, darlings… it’s true.  However cheesy you think that line may sound, it works.  And I dare you to try it.  No, I tripple dog dare you!!!  (hahaha…. I just watched “The Christmas Story” so it’s stuck in my head, and guess what… coming out in my blog!  See… point proven!! HA)

How do you plant good thoughts?  Here are some things I personally do, which I have learned over the years:

  1. Read the Bible (Psalms is a good one to read daily for good uplifting thoughts)
  2. Remember all your blessings (Every night, I make it a point to thank the Lord for all the blessings I can come up with… thinking of even the smallest things like that we have a roof over our head, and a car, and Christmas presents to open, and food every day to eat… really put how blessed you are compared to so many into perspective.)
  3. Laugh (Find something anything that makes you laugh… and have a good laugh!  YouTube can be a great tool during negative thought moments to get an immediate distraction into your mind to put a quick stop to negative thoughts in your mind.)
  4. Read, Listen, Watch (How much good, positive, uplifting things can you get your hands on?  I am a fan of quality motivational speakers and listen to them throughout the year.  I have a personal library of leadership, communication, and life building books… plus some personal good read favorites of course as well.  The more of this you have constantly going into your mind, the more your mind will be bombarded with this and it will outweigh negative thoughts.)

The point is to have so much good memorized in your mind and heart that any attempt of a negative thought is beaten down immediately and easily.  Without effort almost you will be able to push them out of the way like shooing a fly off of your summer picnic meal.  Yes, they will still come after your yummy life food… but they will merely be small helpless flies.  No longer beasts coming to devour your life hopes and dreams.

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!  I have faith in you.  I believe in you.  I cannot wait to hear the good reports!!

Have an amazing night!

Sonya… She Idealist.

Important Things # 22 ~ Be open to new ideas

Not everything is at it seems… sometimes they are better.  Sometimes they are not.  However unless you are willing to be open to new ideas – other than staying stuck in the same mentality you have about any given topic… you will not grow.

Not everything is beneficial to you.  However, it IS beneficial to keep an open willing mind to hear new ideas.  To hear another person’s thoughts and opinions.  Move on from having a teenager’s mind-set that you actually know it all!  LOL  Because you don’t.  You will thank the day that you grow up enough to listen to and respect the input of others.  Even if that input gave you no additional information…….. you at least gave that person the respect to hear, and that alone built them up, which means that you did a good thing.

I am thankful to my friends, family, and the numerous new people that step into my life – whether it be a cashier at a check-out counter, or if I make a new friend.  Everyone is valuable.  You know that you want and adore the times when another person or people are genuinely interested in you and your thoughts and input.  They may never use what you say, however the fact that they cared means much.  Besides, you never know what amazing nugget of gold you may actually receive!

I dare you!  Be open to new ideas today.

Signed…. a constant learner,

Sonya… She Idealist.

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